Dancing all the way to the Post Office

What's with the Post Office? Well.....THE LETTER came. The very letter that I anticipated getting once Livi was here. I knew that the IVF Lab in Colorado will be sending their annual letter slash invoice about what to do with Stef's frozen sperm.....dispose or pay for another year of storage. This time last year, I payed. I was 4 months pregnant and did not know for sure how I would feel about a second child once the baby was here and did not want to burn any bridges just yet. This year is a completely different story. I am very happy to announce that Livi is the one, the only one. There is a beauty and freedom in being so sure of something, especially something as monumental as this. The only way I can say it, is that the way everything is now, feels exactly right. I don't feel like there is someone or something missing. Needless to say, I don't think I need to remind anyone what it took to have Livi. So, the very low chances of a second IVF success coupled with the identical process AND the lack of an internal pull for a second child....well, I think you know what our response is to Colorado. That is not to say that a second child is not welcome in our family, should there be a soul out there insistent on becoming a part of it. The only way I would have another child is if I got spontaneously pregnant on my own. And with obstructive azoospermia in the house, that little soul would literally have to pull some strings.

So I'm dancing all the way to the post office with the notarized letter in hand, the envelope and our fate sealed. I am dancing because I am happy to know that what I have is what I want and what I want, I have. So blissful. And I'm also dancing to the post office, because I'm actually dancing. Yes! I'm Irish dancing again. And back at the school where I had quit 6 years ago and had started up a private dance troop with a group of dance friends instead. That troop was a blast but fell apart after the other girls were burnt out from dancing with us and still at the school. I had no interest to go back to that school but always had this feeling I would find myself back there one day. Low and behold, it happened. My other dance friend who also had quit the school, myself and two others who teach at the school now were having breakfast as we often do as friends. She says to me "Let's go on Monday and just try it out". Trying it out turned into staying (saw that one coming) and loving it as always. I still can't believe I am back. But I don't see it that way. So much has changed there. The politics, stress and reasons I quit for are gone. I'm just happy to be dancing again and doing something just for me once a week. We had a workshop where a certified Irish Dance Teacher was flown in on Saturday. Stef brought Livi to watch the hard shoe (the shoes that make that tapping sound) because she loves to discover new sounds and environments. Got a pic after class:

I had told Livi when we went to see some Irish Dancing this summer that one day she will come to watch her mommy dance. I had hoped it was true........little did I know it was around the corner.

Thanks to R, for getting me to put my shoes on again, and to L and G for sharing the love of the dance.